When it all goes to sh*t
The above photo is the best way I can show you how my morning went...messy, hard to decipher, wild and pretty angry. I had a chiropractic adjustment yesterday and I can definitely feel it today. My body feels really good! But my mind...oh man did it find some newly uncovered and rediscovered old 'stuff' to obsess over. And it did...all night.
So, I woke up aggravated. I was rushed the memories of my dream, which happened to be an old recurring one I used to have as a child and teen and hadn't had, much less thought about in many years. So I wrote about it right away. Which uncovered emotions and thoughts I hadn't visited in years. But it was an unsettling dream and writing process afterwards, which put me into a funk. The funk continued as I walked out of my room and downstairs where my family was already up and about.
Immediately I am annoyed at their existence.
And THIS is where I share with you my step by step on how I dealt with this and how I always deal with my bad mood; by feeling it.
That is the first thing I did; I took a very deep breath. Right there in my kitchen so that the frustration I was feeling at my families shear existence did not bleed out into their energetic space. When the decision is to either roll an eye or possibly say something you just don't mean; choose to take a deep breath. Then you have removed the energetic charge just enough to move you away from your current emotion and into a more receptive state.
After I have secured myself back into my own space (my treatment room), I decide the next step by deep breathing some more. But now I have the energetic space to ask myself a couple of important questions.
'What can I do right now to feel empowered?'
'What can I do that I CAN do, right now?'
Yoga. I can do that right now because I have a computer and an internet connection. After my 40 minute sacral chakra yoga class, I feel much better. But I still feel a bit off, if i'm being completely honest with myself, and that is one thing that I chose to be every moment of every day. My energetic field is still on edge. I know that if another person is in close proximity with me in the next few moments, I am going back into frustration land and my ticket is soon to expired.
Guided meditations are always nice to reset; so I chose one of those. I usually just google videos and look for pages and videos posted by authors or speakers I connect to. There are a plethora of options, find one you like.
I get settled and start my meditation only to be interrupted 10 minutes in.
There are few things that will throw my inner peace into some hectic waves and one of them is definitely getting thrown out of meditation once in. I go very deep, very fast and this sudden change nearly activated my peripheral nervous system and the fight or flight area of my brain. Luckily though, it just made me really, really annoyed.
This is about the time that my awareness starts to shift from the egoistic animal back into my authentic self. We have a talk.
I love you Beverly. Be gentle and ALLOW these feelings to be what they are- temporary. Remember, remember, you are the awareness. You do not HAVE to be annoyed. That is YOUR choice alone. And you have already made the intention to not allow any emotion to close your heart. LET GO.
And with more deep breaths, a second attempt at meditation (make sure your phone is on DND), and some art therapy (I drew a few mandalas) I am writing you this and feeling completely whole.
I could have left my home(like I wanted to!) and just shrugged all that off waiting for some mental stimulus to change my thought pattern and therefore my emotions. But that wouldn't have addressed the issue. I still would have returned home to bed and right back into that annoyed head space because I didn't address it. It would be there, waiting for me.
So this is my process.
I name the emotion-annoyed
I don't beat myself up, I write. draw.
I did something for my physical body-yoga. Stretching is another easy option if you are short on time. Just connect the stretch with your breath and s-l-o-w down.
I talk to myself in affirmative ways-How can we feel empowered? What do you need to feel good?
I listen to what the answer is and TRUST it.
Once i've given the emotion an outlet and heard its cry; I choose to feel good.
The end is ALWAYS a choice. You either chose to stay in your bad mood or you chose to let go and transmute it to good. Absolutely anytime you allow an emotion to be expressed, it changes form.
and lastly and of coursely, I took a warm and bubbly bath.
I love love love you!!